Is everybody stressing out…stressing you out? Why anxiety is contagious and how to desperately take that chill pill.
It happened on Saturday.
I woke up in a good mood, nothing particularly agitating happened, and yet in still:
I felt some type of way: restless. Why was my heart beating so fast? Why do I feel irritated? Why can’t I sleep through the night? Why am I so tired today? (Maybe because I couldn’t sleep through the night last night) Why do I feel boxed in like I just need to get away…in my own house? ANXIETY.
Huh??!!
Then I looked at my phone and realized exactly what the common denominator was. My group chats since Wednesday has been about COVID-19…all of them. My FB timeline: Corona Virus. My twitter timeline: Corona Virus. My IG timeline: Corona Virus. My church updates: Corona Virus. My work email updates: Corona Virus. Literally everywhere: *said in the prolific words of Cardi B* CORONA VIRUS! CORONA VIRUS!
Not only did these conversations invite anxiety in, but she RSVP'd and was the first one at the party.
Defined as “a feeling of worry, nervousness or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome,” anxiety comes up when our prefrontal cortex doesn't have enough information to accurately predict what is to come. And we are seeing this right now with the corona virus. We are receiving hourly updates without context from all of our media sources. Without accurate and complete information, it is easy for our brains to fill in the blanks by going from 0-100 real quick: full on apocalypse.
But how? How is it that I *thought* that I was handling the event really well, but my body was responding in the opposite? How is it that my natural reaction has been very calm but my physiology is stressing out? Sound like a scene from a PIXAR movie to anybody else out there besides me?
Well I can assure you that it’s not because of a few heartwarming Disney Characters running the main frame of our bodies. There is actually a psychological term that explains exactly why this is happening: SOCIAL CONTAGION. According to the Oxford Dictionary of Psychology, this phenomena is the spread of ideas, attitudes, or behaviour patterns in a group through imitation and conformity. Also called behavioural contagion. (Coleman, A., 2008).
So basically, seeing and hearing everybody else stressing out is making you stressed out. So you post and talk about the issue that is stressing you out, further continuing the cycle of the energy of anxiety that is..you guessed it: STRESSING EVERYBODY OUT.
Our own anxiety can be cued or triggered simply by talking to someone else who is anxious. Their fearful words or tweets or video content, are like a virus itself in our brain, emotionally infecting our prefrontal cortex, and sending it out of control as it worries about everything from whether our family members will get sick to how our jobs will be affected.
Pay attention to your body’s reaction to this post alone. How many times did you feel anxious just reading about anxiousness?
When we can’t control our anxiety, it sends a call out for another unwanted family member to slide in through to the party: panic.
Panic is defined as “sudden uncontrollable fear or anxiety, often causing wildly unthinking behavior.”
So here’s the formula: Overwhelmed by uncertainty and fear of the future (anxiety), the rational parts of our brains checkout. So, logically, we know we don’t need all of that toilet paper, but when we see someone else fill their cart all the way up, their anxiety infects us, we bypass the VITAMIN AISLE, and we go into survival mode (panic).
The issue with this formula is that both anxiety and panic stem from one root issue: FEAR.
And historically, I think we can all agree that our track record for making decisions driven by fear...well...has always been scored on the "Needs Improvement"side of the scale.
But Raaya, how can I be calm when it's everywhere?
1. Take a minute to STOP and rest your thoughts a bit.
All you need is 5. So, just take a minute to stop and breathe. What does that look like to you? Do you need to take a shower for a bit? Do you need to grab a diffuser and breathe in your favorite essential oils?
The great thing is that there are a lot of free apps out there that you can access at your fingertips. Put on your earphones and practice mindfulness. If you are a believer, The YouVersion Bible app has a link that couples relaxing sounds with a reading of Psalms: YouVersion Rest. If you prefer sounds without talking, you can find spa sound playlists on both Spotify and Apple Music, Youtube and more. Lastly, the CALM app has guided meditation as well. OR, I could provide the sounding and soothing tones of my voice in the video version of this blog embedded below to guide you to relax in 5…4....3….2....
2. Now that we have managed panic mode a little, logic can come in to play.
Stopping to calm our thoughts communicates to the pre-frontal cortex that you are no longer in imminent risk for danger, and your body slowly transitions out of fight or flight response. In a recent article in the New York Times, Judson Brewer, M.D., suggested to bring in the “bigger better offer.” He explains that since our brains will choose more rewarding behaviors simply because they feel better, we can practice replacing old habitual behaviors — such as worry — with those that are naturally more rewarding.
For example, if we notice that we have a habit of touching our face, we can take these steps:
1. If we are starting to worry: “Oh no, I touched my face, maybe I’ll get sick!”,
2. Instead of panicking, take a deep breath and ask: “When was the last time I cleaned my hands?”
3. Think. “Oh, right! I just washed my hands.”
Just by taking a moment to pause and ask the question, we give our prefrontal cortex a chance to come back online and do what it does best: Think.
Here, we can bring back rational thought: If we’ve just washed our hands, and haven’t been out in public, the likelihood that we’re going to get sick is pretty low.
The more we can see the positive feeling and effects of good hygiene and compare them to the negative feeling of uncertainty or getting caught in anxiety, the more our brains naturally move toward the former, because it feels better.
When our prefrontal cortex comes back online, we can compare anxiety to what it feels like to be calm.
3. Lastly, but most importantly, remember that even this: is a moment in time, not a LIFE sentence, this TOO will pass.
So, yes: be responsible in taking precautions to keep you and others healthy:
Continue practicing good hygiene
Seek medical attention when necessary
LOG OFF SOCIAL MEDIA
Refocus your conversations
Remain knowledgeable of updates AND research context
Take this time with your loved ones as a gift. Families: bring back game nights and eating together at the table. Couples: Turn to your spouse and find out what their favorite color has been all of these years (lol). INTROVERTS: rejoice, your day is here! And everyone else, relax, breathe, and try to step out of self preservation. But rather, this is a time to remain grateful for how you have been kept during this time and compassionate for those affected financially in this transition.
Hold on to God's unchanging WORD.
1. John 14:27: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.”
The Good News: The peace we experience from our faith in Jesus surpasses any temporary peace the world can give; it can ease your deepest fears and soothe your troubled heart.
2. Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
The Good News: The peace of God is just a simple prayer away; approach Him with an open heart and God will grant you peace.
May the peace of God rule and abide in you! ❤️, R.
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