Hi! Can you tell us your name and where you are from?
J: Jessica Poche' - San Bernardino County, Ca
Hey Jessica! What is your faith story? What can you tell us about your personal life testimony?
J: My faith story declares the faithfulness of God! Having experienced various trials from anger and abandonment due to an absent father, sexual abuse, financial hardship which created instability and lack, losing the desire to live, dealing with sideways church folks, being homeless and losing my husband as well as dealing with the death of my father and more has solved the equation: God^3 + me = A caring, loving, real, faithful God who hears me.
Growing up, we (my mom, sisters and I) experienced many hardships. To be honest, the best words to describe us should be "but God". My mom, the most amazing, loving, gifted, kind woman you'd ever meet, had the amazing opportunity to raise three girls, with me in the middle. The baby is 12 years below me and my older sis 1.4 years.
Being short of money, which sometimes made us short on rent, we moved multiple times. This effects me now when people ask me where I grew up because I can't give a clear answer, so I say things like...."Well, I was born in Long Beach, but lived mostly between LA and San Bernardino County". Moving so much made friendships extremely valuable and extremely difficult because I would connect to people and then we'd move.
As I look back from the eyes of my grown years I find it amazing that though we moved so much, we only belonged to two churches. One from under age 4 and the other from age 5 to 20. 20 years to now, I have been under the umbrella of the same church family.
Prior to our baby sis being born and following, I remember the vicarious lessons that were learned being in my moms presence. I learned that true relationship with Christ starts in the home when she lead my older sister and I to Christ when we were about 3 and 5. I learned intercession around age 7-9 years old, waking up in the middle of the night hearing her praying in her closet and having to attend shut-ins. I learned the importance of speech and having a hearing ear when she stood up for us and talked to us prior to getting whooping. I learned dedication to God when we took a family trip to Bakersfield at about 12 years old and our fast was not allowed to broken, though that fried fish my auntie made smelled so good (we got to eat a salad). I learn the significance of tithing, even when you are low and kindness/meekness even when others treat you wrong as she continued to tithe and bless others though we were homeless at times and never argued back or showed aggression even when being lied on. I learned that there was no distance too Great to drive when she continued to keep us active at our church and planted at our high school, even if it meant being tired from bible study or waking up 3 in the morning to get us to school on time from LA to Highland. I learned excellence every time she wouldn't let me go to bed with the kitchen being done half way or making me rewrite my homework over and over until it was presented with my best penmanship...because "my work is a reflection of me". I learned to not be afraid to stand out when she wouldn't allow us to listen to certain music or watch certain shows because of us being Christians. And I learned that when you are broke and hungry, God can miraculously get you groceries for your family.
I know the question is about my faith walk, but this is the foundation that helped pave the walkway for my relationship with God. See, my faith story does not have a clear date of salvation, but rather multiple segments of transformation. Though my mom lead me to Christ and I grew up in church, it was the age of 16 or 17 when I began to form an independent relationship with God. I remember being in High School spending my lunch break going in the library to look up words in the concordance on that bubble white and blue looking computer just to understand the proper interpretation of the Word. It was also around this time I learned I had so much anger in my heart from my dad's absence.
At about 18-19, I went through a time of brokenness where I would ask God to just take me home. I didn't want to kill myself, I just didn't want to live anymore. It was at this state that I recognized I can be honest with God about everything I feel.
At 21, I experienced the power of sex and the reason why abstinence is so important. I got in a relationship I had no business in and learned that God loves us enough to tug our hearts to come back to him and that He knows what and who is best for us. I also learned that the Holy Spirit speaks truth and Gods love doesn't change even though we fail.
As I stated earlier, friendships mean so much to me. What I didn't know is that the very thing I loved would be challenged like Abraham and Isaac. One day as I was hanging around the much loved family like crew that I was connected to for years, God challenged me to separate myself and pursue Him more deeply. So I let go of my friends (not as easy as it sounds) and began a journey of holiness. In this season, at about age 24, I made a friend who taught me how to appropriately interpret and preach the Word. I began going to Valley College and started a ladies group called A Woman's Touch which allowed me the privilege to disciple 4 young ladies in their walk with Christ. I was known on campus as one who followed God and had the honor to lead Campus Crusade 4 Christ. It was also my first time dipping into performing spoken word, though I always wrote poetry. Interestingly, this was also one of the most challenging times where doubt tried to snuff out my faith. All was well, until it wasn't.
A few years went by and as I am finishing school I realize the need to get a job since I was only working part time at my school. So for my last semester, I worked on campus P/T, went to school F/T and worked another job 30 miles away P/T, with many nights being slept in my car. But God is faithful.
Rewind...Friends are important, remember? So at the age of 20 when I began going to the church I now attend, I met this super cool, down to earth, silly, chocolate milk dud who became my really close friend. Why do I bring him up now? Because at age 30, he and I were married. At age 32, 1 year and 5 months after saying I do, He and I were separated by death. This experience transformed my faith in the most unique and amazing way that I can only compare to the death of Christ.
My friend, my husband and brother in Christ taught me that heaven is real. That worship can heal, to be honest before God and careful when saying what "God said". He taught me as I watched him show patience and pray with doctors and nurses who were not always kind to him. When he cried out "Is it time to go home yet?", "I want to go home", I recognized heaven was so tangible for him. He was sure and 100% confident that when he left this earth that he would wake up in heaven with Jesus. He had an ear to hear the correction from God when we had differences in our marriage and took the lead to be the head. It was through this most painful, broken experience that life was born. His death, brought me life.
When he passed, I lost everything, became homeless and was blessed to be able to sleep on my sisters couch where I spent 2- 3 hours day and night worshiping, praying and journaling. I was unable to work, do to being let go wrongfully - yet in the control of God because He knew my husband would get worse and need my support and He knew we didn't have much time and allowed us to spend it more together. So I was broken and broke....but God.
In this life classroom I realized life is meant to be lived to honor God, that Jesus is real, God has things (even the hard things) under control and that I must die empty. See life can sometimes hinder our progress because we care so much about what others think, but after going through something so painful, I didn't care about what others thought anymore. I realized the significance of time. That God is the only one that knows our death date and that I am responsible and accountable to doing what He has created me to do. So every song, every idea, every spoken word, every hairstyle, every book, every play, every business idea, every creative idea, every art piece, every opportunity to take care of my body and eat well, to pray, encourage, teach His Word, forgive and love... everything that He has placed in me is what I must give during this life...I must die empty.
This is my faith story. Still in the making, but having come so far seeing the hand of God through events I thought were curses. They were really refining fire to make me worship and warship ready for His glory.
Thank you for sharing, Jessica. What is your favorite scripture and why?
J: Did you say scriptures?...lol...I have more than one, but I must say Romans 5:8 is at the top.
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. - Romans 5:8
If there was one nugget of wisdom in your walk and growth in Christ that you would want to leave us with, what would that be?
J: Be real with God. He already knows what you are thinking anyway... so why not be honest? Stop playing church; life is too short to play games. Pursue God through Christ, worship Him honestly with all your heart, treat people right (this includes yourself) and die empty.
So good! Do you have any resources (devotionals, books, studies) that have helped you that you would recommend?
The Bible. A lot of people have so many questions and concerns that can truly be answered by reading the Word in it's entirety. I personally wanted to learn more about who God is and His character, so when I read, I write His attributes in the margin and pray how He revealed Himself as after I read.
Also if you want to see the power of God, read the autobiography of George Mueller...amazing testament to God's provision.
Thank you Jessica! Where can we find you online?
Instagram: @Jepoche
Facebook: Jessica Poche
Takeaway:
Romans 5: 1-3 talks to us about the payoff of faith in hard times:
Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.
Not only that, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us.
And Jessica's story above is a walking example of this. 1 Peter 1:1-7 also says, "These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls."
Sometimes we will experience sufferings (or trials and tribulations) in life that may seem unfair. This heat that comes from being tried by fire can be overwhelming. But like the scriptures mentioned above, Jessica's story shows that we have a choice in how we make it through these moments. Should we choose to allow ourselves to lean into Him in all of our brokenness, He will surely be faithful to see us through so that we can endure and be stronger in spite of them (1 Corinthians 10:13).
In your journal today- What are some things that have been testing you this year? What seems overwhelming? What has been difficult? Write these down and lay them before Christ today; unfiltered. Allow Him to minister to you in this moment.
PRAYER:
Lord, I thank you for each and every reader that you have called to share in Jessica's testimony to your goodness in her life and ministry this morning. I lift up every heavy heart today. I ask that you encourage them and renew their strength in the midst of their walk with you in this time. Just yesterday, my good friend talked about believing and agreeing. Some may be struggling with believing this morning. But that is ok- while we stand and believe for them, I ask that they just simply agree. I am believing that you said that although they may feel discouraged, they are the head in every situation, not the tail. So they can lift their head up this morning. I am believing that you said that for every test or temptation, you will provide a way out of carrying that burden solely for themselves. You promised that they can endure it. And I am believing that you said that all that come to you heavy laden, that you will take their burdens and give them rest. Rest is coming in Jesus' name. Strength is coming in Jesus' name. I want to pray that each reader is blessed with joy every day. That they are laughing again. That they know that they are loved again.
And lastly, we speak life over their future. That in the present they are inspired with new ideas, a new hope for what is to come. As a reminder, all things (even the hard ones) work together for the GOOD. And we are so excited for the good that is coming!
In Jesus' name,
Amen
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